It’s My Turn

Every time I hear this song on my iPod, I think about the decision I made to leave my husband of six and a half years to come out, to break the hearts of my husband, my Southern Baptist parents, and my in-laws. I walked out and refused to feel my own heart breaking, because [...]

Cincinnati, Spring 1975

After a week in Chicago with my brother, his wife and son, I flew to Cincinnati for a week with Betty, the woman I’d met at the retreat. It’s difficult to write about that week, because to this day I don’t understand why she wanted me to visit. I still had my right hand in [...]

Cooking, Cleaning and Ruth

The kitchen at Athol Women’s Retreat was a warm and boisterous place. Whatever problems arose in other parts of the house seemed to dissipate in the kitchen. We had two large gas stoves, the old fashioned type each with six burners on top, counter tops galore, a huge pantry, and a stainless steel topped table. [...]

Dyads

One of the most contentious things about living in Athol Women’s Retreat was the issue of sexuality among the members. Marta, ever the revolutionary poet, proclaimed that dyads would be the death of feminism. I had to ask the meaning of the word dyad.  Webster defines a dyad as “two individuals (as a husband and [...]

The Magnificent Seven

In August, 1974, eight women crowded around a wooden picnic table in a log cabin in a remote area of the Adirondacks while one of them negotiated with the voice on the other end. For some time, Malia had talked about creating a permanent retreat for women in the area. She and Diane, along with [...]

Montreal and Sara

When Wendy and I got back to the women’s retreat Sunday afternoon, the women we knew had gone home, but a new contingent had arrived. The first thing I saw at the log cabin was a bright purple VW bug in the parking area.  The cabin was empty, but I heard laughter outside. Malia and [...]

Am I in love?

There is a scene at the end of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade when Jones has to walk across an abyss, trusting that he isn’t walking on thin air when it appears he is. That’s what my first week at the women’s retreat was like. There were no rules or experience to guide me. [...]

The first time

My first night at the women’s retreat in Paradox, NY, we sat around the fire talking and drinking beer until midnight. That’s when I went to bed; the others talked until dawn. I didn’t know anyone, didn’t have a lot to say, and could only drink a couple of beers before I became drowsy. It [...]

Opening the door

The station wagon rambled along the dirt road until the woods cleared and a series of A frames and small buildings were clumped together. Farther along I saw a vast meadow with two A frames off to the right in front of a discarded fishing boat and a narrow road disappearing up a hill next [...]

The pick up

This is long, but it’s exactly how it happened. When no one was waiting for me in Schroon Lake, I panicked and then remembered I was supposed to call. There wasn’t a public phone in sight. The village center was at most two blocks long. One side of the New York Route 9 had no [...]